The Scoreboard Will Not Make You Happy
Stop looking at the scoreboard! Just do your best based on your best and not someone else's. Success and happiness rarely have anything to do with where you finish in the race. If you simply work hard and take care of others, success will come and so will happiness. The name on the front of the jersey is much more important than the one on the back. Life is a team sport.
I had the honor of working as a volunteer at several men's and women's professional golf tournaments. Walking between the lines with some of the greatest golfers in the world was just an incredible experience. My biggest surprise was how different men and women golfers are from one another. The way they interact with the public, each other, the volunteers, and media was like the difference between night and day.
The men arrive in the morning with their chests puffed out. They rarely make eye contact, no smiles, no good morning, no thank you; just steel faced and focused. The women have that same level of focus, yet they are so much more engaging. They smile at everyone, they greet everyone, and they readily say thank you and excuse me. The perceived arrogance of the male professional golfer is replaced by a humble spirit of the female golfer.
My best experience was walking along with Lydia Ko. At the time she was #1 in the world rankings and in the hunt for yet another victory. While she was focused, she also engaged with everyone she met during the five hours I spent with her. She shook hands, signed autographs and even had real conversations with fans in the middle of her play. Her character as a person far exceeded her ability to play golf at a world class level.
In the final round we had a bit of a rain delay. While all the other golfers scurried off to golf carts to return to the club house, Lydia simply walked quietly over to three little girls sitting on their porch. She asked their mother if she could join them. For the next 45 minutes Lydia played with those little girls laughing and joking. She gave them a memory I am sure they will never forget.
Lydia earned my respect and my loyalty as a new fan. I don't follow professional golf closely, but I do check in on her from time to time. This morning I read an article in which she talked about being happy. In this article Lydia said, "People place far too much importance on results when they really should focus on effort and being happy with yourself. If I am happy off the course, then I am happy on the course regardless of the outcome." This young lady is absolutely correct. We spend far too much time comparing ourselves to others when we really should just find a way to be happy with our own effort.
In this digital world where many people tend to live a false online persona, it is important to remember the number of clicks, likes, wins, or losses have very little to do with the quality of a person. I recommend you stop keeping score. Stop focusing on metrics and measurables. If you are sad, depressed, troubled or simply unhappy, the best thing you can do for you is to do for others. You will never see a hearse followed by a U-Haul truck. Happiness is not found in things or even in wins and losses. Happiness is ultimately found in your community and the joys you share with others regardless of what the scoreboard says.
-Tim
