Love is Death to Self
Do you ever come across people in life that you know will have a significant impact on you? I recently had a conversation with a remarkable man of God by the name of Steve. Although this was our first meeting, Steve and I had a more profound discussion in the first few minutes than I've had with others that I have known for years. As I was sharing my story, I told him about this Love is Leadership blog which he was excited to hear about. Then he said something to me that I could not stop thinking about. It was along the lines of "you know Jason, to me love is death to self.”
I can’t particularly articulate why this concept hit me so hard. In one of my first blog posts for AIP, I defined love as the Bible does in 1 Corinthians 13. I've thought long and hard about those verses. Why are they so crucial to my identity as a leader? It never occurred to me that death to self was essential for being a great leader.
Death to self is so vital to being a loving leader because leadership is not about you as an individual. While it is good to have personal goals as a leader, those goals should not supersede the team's goals. Death to self is inherently selfless. As leaders, we should understand that our mission and team are much greater than our selfish ambitions.
Today, when I was doing my daily Bible study, my plan only had two verses. These verses drove the point home for me. In Philippians 2:3-4, Paul says, "Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others."
Go ahead and read that again. Is that not the essence of leadership and death to self? I’m sure many of you have been around leaders that are the exact opposite of what Paul describes, but this is not about them. This is about you and me. Are you a humble leader willing to put your selfish ambitions aside for the good of your organization? Do you look out for the interests of those in your charge? Or do you allow selfish ambition and the need for promotion to guide you in your decision-making?
At one point or another, we have all been guilty of being selfish leaders. Maybe you are a selfish leader, and you didn't even know it. Perhaps you know it and don't care (I hope not!). The good news is, it is never too late to change. You can start small. My challenge to you is to go back to those questions and spend some time reflecting on your current identity as a leader.
- Is that person someone you would want to follow?
- How can you make changes to your current leadership philosophy?
- Are you willing to put your selfish ways aside to die for the good of others?
If you are like me, you will find more joy in serving others than serving yourself.
~Rey